Thursday, October 17, 2013

Crushed by Pumpkins

It is fall, my minions!  I'm sure you've noticed this already, provided you live in the Northern Hemisphere and in an area where the seasons actually change.  I know, I know, the first day of fall was close to a month ago, but I've been busy.  There are various different signs that autumn has arrived which appeal to us more or less depending on our area and interest.  School starts, football is rampant, the leaves are changing, stores are preempting all over holidays by putting out their Christmas displays, that sort of thing.  And, of course, from coffee shops to candle stores, we have pumpkin EVERYTHING.

I'll admit, I like pumpkin.  A lot.  Not just in pie.  I love pumpkin bread, pumpkin cookies, my friend Eve's pumpkin soup (which is not sweet at all and very tasty), and I'm a pretty big fan of pumpkin candles.  Also, I confess that autumn does not truly begin for me until I have my hands on a non-fat, no water, Pumpkin Spice Chai (3/1 on the Chai to Pumpkin Spice ratio, with sprinkles, but no whip) from Starbucks.

Special thanks to the Downtown Edmonds Starbucks.
I love you guys.

That said, I think we may be over doing it just a bit.  And the number of pumpkin-y products seems to be growing with every year.  In fact, just last week USA Today was remarking on the rise of pumpkin-related sales, noting that breakfast foods have been seeing a big increase.  To demonstrate my point, I'm going to subject you to my personal pumpkin run-down.  As of today, I have had:
  • Starbucks Pumpkin Spice syrup - Obviously I'm a fan, but it's easy to use too much of it.
  • Pumpkin Spice M&M's - A vile mistake if ever there was one.
  • Pumpkin Cereal Bars - These were a nice idea, but they don't really taste like pumpkin.
  • Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffins - Quite tasty.  Go have one.
  • Pumpkin Scones - Also delicious.
  • Pumpkin Cookies - Best if moist, and if not moist you made them wrong because there's PUMPKIN IN IT for pity's sake.
  • Instant Pumpkin Spice Chai - This was disappointing, I am sad to admit.  While it tasted all right, the smell was off putting.  Too much anise, maybe?
  • Pumpkin Spice Truffles - I see chocolate and pumpkin in the same light I see chocolate and bacon.  Both are delicious, but if you combine them their powers of deliciousness cancel each other out.  I had both dark and milk chocolate truffles, and while I felt the milk chocolate better balanced the heavy, rich intensity of the filling, I'm not going to buy them ever again.
  • Pumpkin Pie Bagel - Oddly heavy and dry for something that should contain a moist, pulpy squash.
  • Pumpkin Yogurt - This failed on so, so many levels.
And that's where we're at just as of mid-October.  Pumpkin-product season isn't over until at least mid-December, and even then it will linger through the winter holidays.  I am sure I will eat and encounter many more pumpkin-y things.  I'm sure I will regret about a quarter of them.  And then, at the end of the winter holiday season, when I cannot bear the thought of having one more thing with pumpkin in it, they'll take all the products away until we're all just rabid to have them back.  At about mid-September.  Like they do every year.


Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Adventures of the Gray Goth: The Explanation

Good morning, my minions.  Today is the first installment of a segment I have decided to call Adventures of the Gray Goth.  What is a Gray Goth?  Well, that's kind of how I've taken to describing myself.  But what does it mean, you ask?  I will explain.

Disclaimer:  If this term is in use elsewhere on the internet, in social circles, etc and possessing of a different meaning, I don't care.  I didn't look it up.  This is my little corner of the universe, and I will reappropriate as I see fit.

I started using the term "Gray Goth" because gray is a point between black and white.  Like most people, I don't fit securely into just one subculture, but Goth is probably the one I have the most ties to outside of Geek.  I wear an awful lot of black.  I have a deep love for Depeche Mode, The Smiths, Sisters of Mercy, Covenant, Wolfsheim, and so on.  I like old cemeteries, ivy shrouded mansions, and abandoned castles.  I have a fascination with vampires.  Halloween is my favorite holiday.  Walking out into sunlight has made me hiss on more than one occasion.  And I'm pale.

I know there are a number of stereotypical items being thrown around in the above paragraph, but that's kind of the point.  How do we identify a subculture?  Well, generally, by its stereotype.  The above paragraph is also just a lot of things that describe me.

Now for the tidbits that make people want to revoke my Goth card.  I have an obsession with pink these days that terrifies some of my friends.  That obsession lends itself to Candy Shoppe pastels in general (so can include mint, lavender, cotton candy blue, and so on).  Pink is just my favorite.  I pretty much live in blue jeans.  Not that I wouldn't love them to be black jeans, but I challenge you to find a good pair of boot cut black jeans in my size for less than $100 (boot cut is the bit you'll have a problem with).  Much as I would love to pretend I dress like this all the time:

The Anne Jane dress from http://www.gothikas.com.

you're far more likely to find me in blue jeans and a black t-shirt with some graphic relating to a video game or comic.  Which is what I'm wearing right now, actually.  I only dig out my eyeliner for special occasions.  I used to go to raves with Beasty back when we were younger.  I have an equally deep love for Sting, U2, Madonna (90's to early 2000's), BT, David Guetta, Florence + The Machine, Cindy Lauper, and so on.  My second favorite holiday is Christmas/Solstice/whatever and I adore The Nutcracker.  My favorite work of fiction is probably Lewis Carroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, and I'm more than a little fixated on how people have interpreted the work and all the different stories, games, movies, and so on inspired by it.  I love spotted toadstools, and whimsy, and pastel rainbow unicorns.

In short, I'm not hardcore.  I'm not even softcore.  I'm just kind of hanging out on the fringes.  And I'm okay with that.  Most of my friends seem okay with that as well.  It does, however, leave me lacking a short description of my preferred aesthetic.  I bandied around the phrase Gray Goth in a conversation with a friend some days back, and they laughed saying it was perfect.  So what the heck.  We'll run with it.